Feb.
19th
Today
I made tentative steps towards finding out about world events again. MayB’s
sister had posted links on Facebook to news items about events in Ukraine, so I
read a small amount of information about that topic. And I followed the
“trending on Facebook” link to a BBC news item about an attack on members of
Pussy Riot. Events in
Venezuela certainly seem to be worthy of attention, too.
Little
steps, little steps…towards what? I felt like saying “normalcy,” but I don’t know
what that will be now. This particular extreme reaction—of not being able to
bear to see or hear or read any news is so highly abnormal for me that it is hard to see how it can endure for a very
long time, or mark a permanent change.
It’s as if
someone gave me a good shaking, saying “Wake up! WAKE UP!” And something
clicked in my brain: “Wait a minute! Stop being so self-focused! Educate
yourself about what’s happening around the world!”
This development may mean I am moving from one phase of grief (shock?) to another, but
what this new phase might be remains to be seen.
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